2 years of everything

It was easy to live through all the hatred, all the confusion, all the anger, all the guilt, all the loss, the blame, the mistakes, the moments when I could barely breathe.

It was easy.

I died, was born again and died again.

Like he says, it all began with a pinky finger. We met yesterday. AS and I.

I wasn’t prepared.

We met and had a long talk.

I with my usual dumb memory and he as usual flaunting his.

We spoke about our lives - the 2 years!

I was recultant as usual - couldnt let him again into my life so easily.

Still, we spoke a lot.

It then started with the pinky finger. Went ahead to holding hands, holding each other, hugging each other tight. Then we went home - my home, my den. I showed him around, i let him into my secret world - plants, paintings, books, memories and the lies.

I called him Babloo, and that turned out to be his dad’s pet name. weird.

We lay on the bed and kissed and hugged for hours together. Ginger water for his bad throat, peanuts and fruits are what we ate.

His Bali trip, his massage stories, his spiritual work, things he did at work to get a glimpse of me - all his stories.

I couldn’t share mine - I had buried them somewhere deep.

Morning came and also the time to say goodbye.

Dropped him at gate no. 3 and waved at him thrice.

I love him.

I shut myself down.

It was easy.