Thoughts of the Worm

Somethings have gone “left” instead of “right”. Some items when i looked within myself - BE CALM with everyone! DONT POINT OUT TO ANYONE SPECIFIC!  people can always betray! Remember this! Not everything has to be Shared! Focus only on building skills, receiving feedback - INSPECT & ADAPT 1. i have to spend less time interacting/reacting to the kids and more time with my people and superiors! 2. LISTEN with no intruption till end. Rephrase. Give less instruction and let people be! ask them, “do you want my ideas/suggestions?” 3. I should not be the “sentence grabber” 4. FOCUS on the conversation. You are NOT in a competition, unless I really am in one! When they come with problem- 1) listen full 2) ask where they need help 3) think for a while 4) suggest When SA becomes stubborn- 1) Ask where is the problem 2) Ask what she exactly wants to achieve 3) Ask if it is very urgent and what will happen if not done right away. 4) Ask if she can do it right away. 5) If yes, ask her to d...

Today, I found this - And when at last you find someone to whom you feel you can pour out your soul, you stop in shock at the words you utter - they are so rusty, so ugly, so meaningless and feeble from being kept in the small cramped dark inside you so long. 

Lets see what energies are we talking about here? Ra -  BIG EGO! Too much talking and too much boasting. Doesnt make an attempt to listen. Directs well. Networks well. Likes to ‘mentor’ people. wants to be the hero. I think:  Sense insecurity. Scared of Rv. I should: Not share anything, as i will get nothing. so Only praise him And tell him he is a saviour! ;) Ai - The Guide, MEDIUM EGO! Calm and Collected. Intentional. Friendly. Good Listener. Protects. Advices well. People person. Wants to be called ‘protector’. i think: Needs attention which he doesnt ask for. Doesnt mess with Rv. Tries to show that he is hesitent to hurt me. Tries to be friends, even though he doesnt want to be sometimes. wants followers. I should: show that i am friendly with him and have 200% faith in him. let him believe that i have shown him my most vurnerable side. be as close as possible... literally. Believe but not Trust. Not share any personal stuff. He wants to protects.... so let him do it and T...

Sex does not mean Love. This reality hit hard. Its painful to know that there need not be love to have sex. sex is just sex. just physical. just hormones talking.  love is when you find happiness being with that person. it has got nothing to do with sex. offcourse sex is a bonus. but it has nothing to do with sex. everytime, i think sex means love, it’s proved wrong. some lessons are taught repeatedly to teach us something. Maybe its time for me to learn something that goes against my fairy tale. This view is so different that its disturbing. so hard for me to accept. Lesson #1: do it, enjoy it and ERASE it.  Lesson #2: Its NOT Love! it will never be one.

There are events in life that change the game altogether. They come with a bang and impacts everything - sometimes in a good way and sometimes in a terrible disaster generation way. For me 2020 started with a bang - in the most surprisingly nice different way. touchwood - i hope it continues to be this way. Mixed feelings, fear of judgement, eagerness to be with the right people... to have everything  right. I started with this feeling. Then i met this person. Someone who I never thought would resonate with me. he was trying to decode me.... introvert, extrovert, ambivert... how does it matter? i just hope he is not faking it 😥

its okay my dear. Some people are best kept away from your life. Dont think about them. They never made an effort to be with you or even understand you. why waste time thinking about them? you have done your best to keep things normal and be connected to them. They never appreciated. Everyone has a choice. Make yours :)